The release of exam results is a topic that raises a lot of news in the country. There is no lack of news reporting the tragedies of failure among the news expressing the excitement of passing. Here we are talking about such tragedies.
From then to now in Bangladesh, suicides were reported in many of the news that came out with the release of exam results. It was reported from several places in the country in the last few days that it happened this time as well. Today, many beautiful lives have left us who thought that failing the exam meant failing the whole life. Because our country is a country that has recorded that the only solution to a problem is suicide.
A number of reasons may have contributed to suicide. When asked about it, it was found that the main reason for this was the reactions of parents and teachers due to failure. Therefore, we should not forget that parents as well as teachers should act very intelligently in such a situation. They should conduct the examination in such a way that the child does not suffer. We felt it was timely to inform you in this regard.
In a country like ours, if there is no wealth or power, the only thing to win life is ‘education’. They think that education is the only way to win life, especially for the middle class and lower class and upper poor class people. So every parent wants to keep their child safe. Education is the only help for such determined parents. Because of this, parents resort to some effective actions for their child.
The other thing is that the teachers are also exerting some pressure to make the child pass the exam today. Because the teacher’s job is to teach. Due to such issues, teachers exert various pressures with the aim of making the child pass the exam.
But children are not equally intelligent at the pass level of the regular or high school. Their intelligence levels are different. It is a physical condition. In one corner there are very talented children. In the other corner are the incompetent children. The middle part of this usually goes to the top. This is normal.
There is a section that is not mature enough to be educated. There is another part which has some level of intelligence but lacks the required intelligence and is not interested in learning. Therefore, they do not engage in education. Also, if there are some side factors, for example, if the family has to bear the burden, if they have to engage in field work, if they have to do other work, the child will miss learning.
All these factors may make it impossible to pass a part. These children may be under some pressure due to not getting the results they expect. Then they try to do some harm. Some are sad.
We call the reactions that occur within the first week after this kind of mental crisis as “Acute reaction stress”. This happens instantly within the first week. It does not develop into another mental illness.
In this situation, each person can react differently. Some are sad. Some people do little harmful things. Some try to commit suicide. But suicide is not a result of acute reaction stress. If these children have suffered from depression before, this kind of acute reaction stress can lead to suicide.
Suicide is usually caused by depression. Therefore, we have to consider whether these children were mentally ill before that. In such cases, some people try to commit suicide. Taking 4 more Panadol pills will not kill you. Then the damage is done based on the strategy they use in those cases. For example, if you drink an insecticide, you can die. It is called ‘Deliberate Self Halt’.
This is not the first time such cases of suicide have been reported. From time immemorial, children react differently when under pressure. The other thing is that Bangladesh is a country where there is a lot of suicide. It used to take the first place in the world, but today it has decreased.
Then it is a common thing in this country that suicide is the solution to a certain problem. It is called (Copycat Suside). It jumps because of hearing habits. Therefore, when these children are under pressure, they kill themselves thinking that this is the solution to the problem.
Before writing the exam, parents cannot say ‘it doesn’t matter if you pass, it doesn’t matter if you fail’. It is not normal. It is a well-known fact in this country that if a child is to have a good future, he must get an education.
Due to some unfortunate reasons such as lack of intelligence level or different environmental factors or some talented children disrupt their education due to various problems. You may fail the exam due to problems at home, romantic relationships etc. Because of that, this pressure increases.
In such cases, the behavior of the child should be taken care of. Care must be taken to see if the child is deeply shocked about it, whether there is a change in the child’s behavior, i.e. normal habits, normal behavior, and daily activities. There is a difference in those things.
If the child is extremely shocked, cries without sleeping, or if there is a change in behavior or routine, parents should be concerned. At that time, parents should be smart and understand them.
Exam is not the only thing in life. You can retake the exam. Otherwise, what other things can be done to survive, etc., that can calm the child in this situation. It should be done if the child says, “I’m bored now.” If you say, “I feel like dying now”, it is an important matter. When it is announced that someone is dying, the common popular opinion is that “people don’t do what they say, they do it secretly”.
But if someone actually says that he will die, the probability that he will actually do so is very high. To say I feel like dying is serious. In such cases, parents should be especially careful not to abandon the child physically and mentally. If the child’s daily routine changes depending on the child’s response, if they cry, are sad, do not eat, and if they express something, they should be especially careful. It is essential to comfort the child until this mental condition of the child is relieved.
Need to strengthen the mind. It should be explained to the child that being strong means that there are many strategies to conquer life apart from the exam. Because most people work in this world not through education but through other career paths. It is essential to sit with the child in support and not alone, saying that way and to appear again for the exam, etc.
Most children are not alike. Children who fail exams are children who did not work very hard. Most people do not have this situation. Such a situation exists for very few people who are interested. But there are children whose results are worse due to other factors. So parents should be careful about it. You should not say anything about the child’s response, about failing the exam at that time, or neglecting, mocking, etc.
It is a characteristic of every animal to see the child that gave birth to its gene rise. Rising is a relative term. That is animal nature. It’s even more of people. Every parent wants to raise their children. That competition is not a bad thing.
But it should be realistic. Competitiveness is our genetic trait. So the comparison is wrong. It’s human nature. The evolution of the world happened on that basis. But the general society analyzes that competition is not good. We are doing something against nature. The ability is to compete.
Defeat is the result we expect and after working to a certain extent, there is heartache in defeat. It won’t go away. If we expected an A9 and got an S9, there is too much pressure. We expect an S9 and it will be enough if there is an S or two. Then the pressure is low. Pressure is relative. The resulting shock and reaction is relative. There is only the lessening of the pain of accepting defeat.
There is another point here. He expects the amount of intelligence. Then there is the relativity of the pressure based on the magnitude of the difference between the amount expected and the amount received. Parents and teachers need to be concerned about this situation. Because the exam is not the whole life of a child. You have to remember that it is just another step in life.
This society has a set system. The traditional view of ‘one way education’ is something that exists in our country as well as in Asian countries. That’s what he taught us. He learns that ‘Education is the only skill that saves the future’. That is the nature of traditional thought patterns. It is very difficult to change it. It is difficult to break this belief.
By now, the property has been mortgaged or the medical degree has been obtained. But there are countless other professions that can earn more than that. Now the salary of a mason and a carpenter is 2500 rupees per day. But a doctor’s salary per day is less than that.
In this country, this traditional thought pattern, the traditional thought pattern of education, government job has taken root. That is why various other professions are scarce.
It is not easy to find a mason or an electrician in this country. Doctors are more than that. Therefore, there are countless professions that earn more than that and work less than that. They don’t need to learn math, geography, history, science. It just needs training. Too much rest.
For example, if you give 1000 Tk today, you can find any doctor. But is it possible to find a mason that easily? Sometimes it takes months to find such a person. This is why we need to change the pattern of thoughts and wishes. People need to move away from traditional thinking patterns towards other professions that can bring more income.
Parents have other things to say. The best thing is to learn from the child’s talent. It can go up. But now knowledge comes from what is learned. But what is needed today is the ability to do that in practice. It used to be said that ‘Knowledge is Power’. If you have power, if you have wealth, you can get knowledge for money.
Therefore, various measures should be taken. For example, studying IT is better than becoming a doctor. There are many job opportunities. There are many sources of income. The income is high. Learning is easy. It is different from the traditional way of looking for such a comfortable place to live.
Today there is an opinion that 13 years of schooling should be made compulsory. It doesn’t need to be that way. We send the children to school and we get workers under a normal framework. Other jobs don’t really require that. That is why after learning to write and speak, it is necessary to train for various professions. Sending everyone to school until the age of 13 is a silly story.
Today, a child’s examination in the traditional education pattern looks at knowledge, not intelligence. Because of this, the creativity of a child is completely lost. They can only copy. Copying something from memory. They are not creative. Due to such methods, a situation such as the inability of a child to accept defeat and suicide has developed.
Finally, parents and teachers should be asked to help the child get rid of the pressure without putting pressure on the child in such a situation. Exam is just another step in life. There are many examples in the world, stories of people who achieved their success through failure. Therefore, it is necessary to successfully face defeat and realize that it is one of the challenges in life and help the child’s future to win. Then it will be possible to reduce the reporting of bad news like suicides.
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